Inappropriate things I say to my parents

I don't even know how this one started ...

Mom calls the cell the other day, and I'm all "Hi, Mom! Chat-chat-chat, blah-blah-blah."

Mom starts talking about the Wii and how she and Dad never play it and should get someone who really knows wiring to hook it up. (FYI: people have hooked up their shit, like, 8 times. They just keep screwing it up.)

Seriously, I don't know what gives me the idea, but for some reason, I start pitching to her a theoretical Wii Sex game.

It's great, I tell her, because it's all real-life movements - just like Wii Bowling. It's all in the wrist. Nursing home residents would go nuts for it.

"SARAH!" she says. "This is not a conversation to have with your mother!"

"No, seriously. Hear me out! This is a million-dollar idea. Wii Sex."

Pause.

"Well, you couldn't call it 'Wii' because men wouldn't buy it."

"Exactly," I said, happy she was getting on board. "Especially in our target demographic - they would probably already have some penile insecurity. We could call it ... hm ... the Wii NER!"

And that's where I lose her. Or perhaps, she never really came around in the first place.

"You are seriously disturbed," she says. "You're very weird."

So, now I kind of feel like one of those poster children for the Today Sponge.